Baptisms, Marriages & Deaths

General.

 

As Christians, we are used to bringing before God the important events of our lives.  Our children become part of the congregation through baptism, we make our marriage vows in front of our fellow Christians and, when the time has come, our souls are entrusted to our Maker’s care by our friends.

 

The Chaplaincy is more than happy to arrange appropriate services for members of our congregations, for their families and for members of other churches in good standing with their home congregations. 

 

It is important to note that:

• France is a rigorously secular state.  Thus, in France the registering of births and names, the union of a man and a woman and matters concerning a death are all handled by the state.  What happens in the church is seen as being between those involved and their God and has no legal standing.

In Aquitaine, which covers an area the size of Wales, we have one stipendiary priest.  He is helped by others, ordained priests and other licensed people, all of whom are unpaid volunteers, all already retired and all with family lives of their own.  So please give lots of notice and have a fair degree of flexibility.

• The churches which we use are not our own; we borrow them at times and use them in ways that have to be acceptable to the local priest, his Bishop and the Mayors of the Communes.  So we need to ask permission well in advance and ensure that the orders of service we use are in line with those acceptable to the local Catholic Church.

Baptisms. 

 

The Chaplain is happy to baptise both adults and children according to the rites of the Church of England.  So if you attend church regularly and you or your parents live, for at least part of the year, within the Chaplaincy, please get in touch.

 

Children. Please first contact the Chaplain to discuss if and when it will be possible to organise a baptism. 

 

The Church very much prefers that a baptism should form part of a regular service.  In this way, a congregation can share in the joy of welcoming a new member and provide support for him or her in their Christian commitment.  

 

There should normally be at least three Godparents or Sponsors, two being of the same gender as the candidate.  They must be baptised Christians, though not necessarily Anglicans; you are after all baptised into the Church and not into a particular denomination.

 

However, it may be possible in very exceptional circumstances to arrange a private baptism, always within our constraints of availability of course.  Please first consult the Chaplain, whose contact details are given elsewhere.

 

The service is free and we do not expect any payment.  However, if you wish to make a donation, it will be very welcome.

 

In an emergency, baptism can be conducted by any baptised person using water and with the words “ (name) I baptise you in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit”, or similar words.

 

Adults. It is always a joy for the Chaplain to baptise adults.  This is only done as part of a regular service so that the person can be welcomed into the congregation, and would normally lead to confirmation.  Please first contact the Chaplain directly to discuss the way forward.

 

We need to point out that you can only be baptised once in your life.

Contact: Caroline Gordon-Walker tel: 05 53 29 36 03  email: carolinegw@wanadoo.fr

 

Weddings.

 

Legal Status.  In France, the ceremony in church has no legal status, though it remains very important for Christians!  The legal ceremony takes place at the Préfecture or Mairie, the equivalent of a ceremony in a Registry office in Great Britain, and all arrangements should be made via the local Mairie.  Armed with the Marriage Certificate, the happy couple then come to church to seek a blessing and to make their vows in front of their peers. 

 

For those living in France, the legal procedures are clear.  For those coming from outside France, the implications of entering into a marriage contract outside their country of residence needs careful consideration and legal advice.  We have no expertise in these matters so we suggest that you take proper advice from your own legal adviser at home.

Conditions. Marriage is an important commitment and the Church takes it seriously.  Certain conditions thus have to be complied with:

• The Chaplain or other clergy will only officiate if the couple, or their parents, live in the Chaplaincy or have a place or residence or are regular worshippers here.
  
  
• An Anglican service can only be performed if one of the couple has been baptised into a Christian church of any denomination.
  
  
• If the couple live outside the Chaplaincy, we expect them to inform their local priest or minister of their desire to marry here and obtain and advise us of his or her approval.  In some cases, it will be appropriate for him or her to prepare the couple for marriage.
  
  
• If one or both of the couple are divorced, the service is normally that of “Prayer and Dedication After a Civil Marriage”.

 

Location. The service can be held in one of the churches in which we worship or, sometimes, by arrangement, in another church or chapel.  In the Dordogne, the Catholic Bishop asks that we only use churches which have been approved. The Chaplain will inform you of this list.

It is not appropriate to hold a Christian service in any venue other than a consecrated and registered church or chapel.

 

Forms of Service.  We use the Marriage Service from Common Worship or the form of Prayer and Dedication after a Civil Marriage.  Bilingual services can be arranged.  In some cases, it is possible to hold joint Anglican and Catholic or ERF services.  It is usual to have two or three hymns and at least one reading from the Bible.  Other suitable readings and music can be included, but please discuss them at an early stage.

 

Choir and Organist. When the wedding takes place in one of the churches we use regularly, we can usually arrange for an organist and possibly a choir.  In other churches, this may be more difficult.  They should be consulted about the choice of music. Not all French churches have organs and where there is one, quality can be variable.  Thus the choice of music will be influenced by the quality of the instrument and by the availability of appropriate settings.

 

Fees.  The fees are in line with those charged elsewhere in the Church of England.  These go towards the cost of running the Chaplaincy.  In addition there will probably be the organist’s fee and expenses together with the fee payable for the use of the church itself.  These and other charges should be agreed when initial enquiries are made.  Payment should be made at least a week before the ceremony.

 

Other Clergy.  Normally, the Chaplain or one of the clergy with permission to officiate locally will take the service.  If you wish to use another Anglican priest, permission must be obtained from the Chaplain and/or the Bishop.

Dates.  These should be booked as far in advance as possible, using the forms available from the Chaplain.  He will usually want to meet the couple as soon as possible to discuss the meaning of Christian Marriage and to consider the form and content of the service.

 

Contact: Caroline Gordon-Walker tel: 05 53 29 36 03  email: carolinegw@wanadoo.fr

 

Funerals. 

Contact: Gillian Strachan tel: 05 53 58 12 58   email: gillstrachan@wanadoo.fr

 

A death, no matter how much it is anticipated, always comes as a shock; the legal and administrative complexities can be overwhelming. We hope that the following will help.  Whilst the following applies widely, these notes have been prepared with people who are British citizens in mind; other nationalities should consult their own embassies on matters such as repatriation and registration.

 

The Church.  Please contact the Chaplain as soon as you can.  For members of one of our congregations and for members of their families, he will be happy to try to find a suitable person to officiate. He will want to discuss the time and place, whether the service is to be conducted in a church, at an interment or at a cremation and will be able to advise on many other matters.

 

Procedures to be followed after a Death.  After a death at home, the person’s regular doctor needs to be informed.  Whether or not they were in attendance and provided that there were no suspicious circumstances and that death was due to natural causes, he will certify the death and provide the necessary death certificate (certificat de décès). 

 

If however the death occurs in a public place or foul play is suspected, an enquiry will be held.  The death certificate wiil be issued by the Public Prosecutor (Procureur de la Republique).

 

In the case of an accident, a violent death or a suicide, it will be the gendarmerie who need to be informed and who will provide the death certificate.  After a forensic doctor has made a report and the police have investigated, a judge will issue a burial permit (permis d’inhumer).

 

For a death in hospital or home, the death certificate will be provided by their staff.

 

In the UK where you have actively to choose to allow your organs to be donated.  In France, unless you specifically choose not to make your organs available and if you die in hospital, it is automatically assumed that you accept that they will be used to help others.  If you wish to opt out, you will need to mention this in your will or get yourself registered with the Registre National des Refus.  Your local doctor will be able to advise.

 

 

Registering the Death. Within 24 hours, you must advise the Mairie in the locality in which the death occurred and a declaration de décès will have to be made.  If the person has died in hospital, the hospital will take the necessary steps to advise the Mairie. For a death at home, the undertaker may do this for you, if asked.  This can actually be done by anyone. 

 

The staff at the Mairie will require to see:

 

• A form of identity for the person reporting the death.
  
  
• The death certificate from the doctor, gendarmerie or hospital.
  
  
• The person’s identity documents, such as passport or Carte de Séjour, if he or she had one. 
  
  
• The deceased person’s parents’ names, including the mother’s maiden name; a birth certificate would be ideal.
  
  
• For a married man or woman, the spouse’s full name and the wife’s maiden name; here a marriage certificate could be useful.

When the death has been registered by the Mairie, the burial permit (permis d’inhumer) will be issued.  It is advisable to obtain several original copies of all certificates, as these will be needed by the undertaker, the French Social Security, health insurers, pension provider/s and those dealing with the estate. 

It may be advisable to register the death with the General Register Office in the United Kingdom or other country in which the estate is to be settled.  Application can be made to the British Embassy in Paris, or, on arrival in the United Kingdom, to the Nationality and Passport Section, Consular Division, Foreign and Commonwealth Office, Old Admiralty Building, London SW1A 2AF.

 

The Mairie can issue a multilingual version of the death certificate (Formule Plurilingue de l’Acte de Décès). This may be useful for registering the death in your home country if necessary and for sending to foreign pension providers and similar.

 

The Undertaker and the Timing of the Funeral. An undertaker (Pompes Funèbres) needs to be contacted to take care of the body; he will take responsibility for arranging the actual burial or cremation.  French undertakers often try to persuade families that they must accept the first available date for the funeral, often within 48 hours.  This may mean that friends and loved ones, especially those coming from outside France, are given insufficient notice to attend.  It may also mean that someone from the Chaplaincy may not be available.  Under the six day rule, the French Code of Law relating to burials (Art.R 2213 – 33) actually requires that the funeral take place within a minimum of 24 hours and a maximum of 6 days.  Sundays and bank holidays are not counted.  So please don’t be bullied into an early date if it doesn’t suit you.

 

Before you agree to any dates or times, you must ensure that the Chaplain has been contacted and availability established.  This is particularly important if there is to be a cremation as dates, once set, are virtually impossible to change.

Where family and friends cannot attend before the end of the six day period, a cremation followed by a service of Interment of Ashes at a later date might be suitable.

 

If the death occurs outside France, the burial must take place within six days of the body arriving in France.

 

In special circumstances and with the agreement of the Préfet of the Département in which the burial is to take place, the law allows that the time period can be altered.

 

Legal authorities are required to seal the coffin before the funeral and to
verify identity.  Failure to have this done often leads to delays.

 

If you wish to take the body out of the commune in which the coffin has been sealed, a separate authorisation can be obtained from the Mairie.

 

 

Burial. Burial, which must be in a coffin, can take place in a cemetery with the Mayor’s permission and must take place between 24 hours and six days after the death, though, in exceptional circumstances, the Prefet can issue an extension.

It may be possible to reserve a place in a cemetery by applying to the local mairie,  The reservation fees and the length of time that the plot is reserved may vary.

 

Cremation. There are crematoria at Bordeaux, Périgueux, Tonneins and Agen.  Others can be found at Angouleme and Limoges  The nearest crematorium may thus be some way away.  

 

Before a cremation can take place, permission is required from the Mairie of the commune in which the person died or, if the body has been moved, that of the commune in which the body was placed in the coffin. They will require written evidence from the next of kin, an executor or other responsible person that it was the wish of the deceased to be cremated.   A medical certificate of no impediment will also have to be produced.

 

The ashes will be presented to the family in an urn.  If they agree or if this is provided for in the will, the contents may be shared between the members of the family.  If the ashes are to be placed in a tomb, the Mairie has to grant permission.  However no permission is needed if the ashes are to be scattered on private land, at sea or in a forest or the mountains.  They may not be scattered on public paths, roads or rivers.

 

Most cemeteries have areas set aside for scattering of ashes.

 

Someone to Officiate. The Chaplain will arrange for a suitable person to attend and to provide support during what is a very difficult time.  At the outset, it will be very helpful if he or she could be given:

 

The name and contact details of the undertaker.

Proposed dates and times of the funeral or cremation.

Details of the Mairie with whom the death has been registered.

Directions to the church, graveyard or crematorium, ideally with a map so that he can advise others on how to get there.

Contact details and location of the church, if one is to be used.

 

Forms of Service. The Chaplain or the person who will be taking the service will want to agree with the next of kin not only the time and place of the service but also learn a few details about the deceased if he or she is not known to them.  He or she will also want to agree, amongst other things, on the form of service to be used, the language or languages to be used, your choice of music, hymns, psalms, readings and, perhaps, a eulogy.  He will advise on the amounts payable for the Church’s fees.

 

Bank Access, Inheritance Issues and the Will.  It is very important that you contact a local lawyer (notaire), ideally within two weeks.  The notaire will help ensure access to any bank accounts.  There are penalties for the heirs if the process of settling the estate takes too long.  To find an English speaking notaire, go to www.notairesdefrance.fr and click on the Union Flag for the English language version.

 

For Repatriation of the Body.  You may want to return the body to your country of origin either for burial or for cremation, which, it is important to note, is likely to be very expensive.  The processes involved may not be familiar to your local undertaker.  It is suggested that you contact a larger organisation such as the PFG (Pompes Funebres Générales).  Whoever you appoint to deal with these matters, it is essential that you advise them whether a cremation or a burial is envisaged and whether the body will be transported by road or air.  This will ensure that the preparation of the body and the type of coffin to be used will be appropriate.

 

Where burial is planned, the paperwork needed to accompany the body is simple. However, where the body is to be cremated the paper work is more complicated and all concerned should be aware that delays of about a week are to be expected before the coffin can be sent.

 

In either case, the documentation should include a doctor’s certificate giving the clinical cause of death and not merely a description such as “Natural Causes” or the circumstances such as “Accidental Death”.  Failing this, permission for burial or cremation in Britain will normally be withheld until a post-mortem examination has been carried out.

 

The state requires the family, a surviving spouse or, if there isn’t one, the children, to pay for the funeral expenses.  For people with very limited income, no savings and with no children, the costs may be difficult or impossible to cover.  You may be eligible for help from the commune.  So please visit the mairie.  They will look at your resources and consider what help they may be able to give.  In cases of extreme poverty, the commune will pay for the funeral.

 

The British Consulate. The Consul in Bordeaux, who covers the South West of France, will be able to help.  This may include contacting relatives in cases of difficulty, relaying instructions to undertakers and liasing with a UK undertaker in the event of language difficulties.  It cannot pay funeral or repatriation expenses. Please ring 05 57 22 21 10